Hi,
I want to share a piece that feels too heavy for Instagram, but too honest not to write down here.
Poem:
I hate that I love you.
Because love shouldn’t feel like fear
like bracing myself
before I even speak.
You break me,
then pull me close
like nothing happened.
You say the right words,
but they always rot in your mouth.
I tell myself this time will be different,
but it never is.
It’s the same fight,
the same tears,
the same silence stretched too long.
And still, I stay.
Not because I don’t see the truth,
but because I’ve forgotten
what love is supposed to feel like.
This isn’t love.
It’s a wound I reopen every day,
a prison I mistake for a home.
And the cruelest part is
I don’t know how to stop.
Written by TearsOfTheSoul
Illustration by Holly Warbs
I think writing this was my way of saying out loud what so many of us quietly live through. If it reached you, know you’re not alone in feeling stuck, or in realizing you deserve better, it WILL get better.
I’d love to know, what’s the hardest part of choosing yourself, even when you know you need to?
Talk soon,
Poems I’ll Never Post
P.S. If this piece stayed with you, my book Between Heaven & Earth carries more poems written in the same voice—about love, loss, and finding your way back to yourself. You can find it here.